Cheryl's Logic

Looks

2011-08-09T01:10:00.000+08:00

No, looks aren't everything, but they make you notice something, which may or may not lead to everything. So if you don't have looks, nobody notices anything, and everything becomes nothing.

That was real deep for me. And emo. So...scratch that and fuck cares about looks. If you don't notice the awesomeness that lies beneath, you're not worth it.

Then why am I still hung up on you? Huh.

Where is my Pottermore welcome email!?!?

Golden Girls

2011-08-04T00:59:00.000+08:00

Oh Rose Nylund, how I love thee.

Disclaimer: This post is just for my easy future reference, so...you don't have to read it.

Rose:
I’ve never been in jail. I won’t make it. They always prey on the weak and innocent. The others will taunt me for trying to excel at my work in the laundry. I’ll fall in with a bad crowd, whose leader looks like Ethel Merman. And I’ll be forced to engineer a daring prison break using my laundry cart. From that time on, I won’t know a moment’s peace. I’ll scar my fingerprints with battery acid and I’ll run from town to town, taking jobs that people have who got bad grades in school. And then one day, they’ll find me, holed up in a little shack in the Louisiana bayou. And a sheriff named Bull will call my name out over a megaphone and when I make a run for it he’ll riddle my body with bullets! Oh please don’t let them take me downtown! I want to live! I want to live!

I freaking love this episode.

Taylor Swift Enchanted

2011-08-03T16:47:00.000+08:00

You know things are getting bad when you find yourself empathizing with Taylor Swift's lyrics...

"The playful conversation starts, counter all your quick remarks like passing notes in secrecy."

"I'll spend forever wondering if you knew."

"And now I'm pacing back and forth, wishing you were at my door."

"Please don't be in love with someone else."
"Please don't have somebody waiting on you."

Somebody help me oh my god. STOP GETTING INTO MY HEAD, TAYLOR DAMMIT SWIFT!

Missing him

2011-07-30T23:45:00.000+08:00

"Sometimes I think I'm crazy to even think about you this much, but it's an obsession now - to fantasize about what we could be."

Whoa, that sounded like it belonged on Tumblr! I'm so proud of myself. I guess I've been getting the hang of it during the hours I spent on it today, browsing through soooo many awesome pictures of food.

Then suddenly I caught sight of some emo-ish, wistful, mushy notes and now I'm trying to put myself in their shoes and write love notes to myself.

If I am not making sense to you, don't worry. Because this post is mainly for my eyes only, and I'm sort of writing in code here, just in case some people come around on my blog looking for gossip.

Ah, you. How I missed you today.

Yes, I am talking about ice cream. It's always what you can't have that makes you want it most.

BOOKS BOOKS BOOKS

2011-07-19T16:12:00.002+08:00

I've discovered that the less money I have, the more shopping urges I get. Is this some kind of sick, twisted game life is playing with me? Life, you pervert.

First I wanted to buy more dresses at F21. Then I got distracted by the Harry Potter shirts from Uniqlo.
But in the end I didn't get anything because I remembered I had only about $20 to spare in my bank account.

Thus, I started collecting debts! [If you owe me moola and you're reading this, my POSB Savings account number is 033-49716-4, thankyouverymuch.]

Feeling a little melancholy about the missed buys, I went on http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/ to browse through books I currently can't afford, and came up with a list:

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/Machine-Death-Ryan-North/9780982167120

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/Invisible-Man-HG-Wells/9780141194912

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/Lady-Chatterleys-Lover-Lawrence/9780141192482

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/Infernal-Desire-Machines-Doctor-Hoffman-Angela-Carter/9780141046686

http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/Confederacy-Dunces-John-Kennedy-Toole/9780141045641

Thanks for the celebration

2011-07-16T02:04:00.000+08:00

I don't know why I'm still blogging here, since no one even reads my words anymore, but still, I thought it'd be a nice gesture to mention how much I appreciate the week-early birthday celebration this year. It was fun.

And thanks for saying I look sexy in the dress hahahahaha. Although sexy sounds a little...gross.

So now that I've discovered how free my movements can be in a dress (although I can't jump high or bend or squat or anything), I'm itching to buy more.

SPAMMING MYSELF

2011-07-12T23:41:00.000+08:00

You know what? I am so bored that I am spamming myself on my own blog. This post is basically about nothing.

...

That's it. I have nothing to say here. Although if I were to spell out my thoughts right now, it'd go something like:

Man when is Joss Stone's album coming out and I am so bored I'm writing a blog post to myself and why can't I find Taking Back Sunday's album online and I'm so hungry can someone cook maggi mee for me because I can't be bothered to wash the dishes anyway yay Harry Potter on Saturday and yay dress-shopping tomorrow which is a first for me and I'm not even sure I'll get one or if I'll actually have the guts to wear it on Friday. Wish me luck!

HARRY POTTER TICKETS

2011-07-12T00:56:00.002+08:00

Finally, after days of tumultuous sleep, I have booked the tickets for Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 2!

[Crowd applause/children laughing/trumpeting fanfare/graduation caps being flung in the air with gleeful abandon/confetti thrown everywhere/gay grins on faces/wiping of single teardrops on smiling cheeks]

Adding to this joyous milestone in my almost-nineteen years of life is Taking Back Sunday's self-titled album, plus the imminent release of Joss Stone's LP1; all the blood in my veins are confused. Do they flow to my brain to handle the KAPOW or to my happily-flailing arms?

Pardon me for the long and endless sentences. They are products of my brain on a music high.

Now that I've gotten words strung in a sane fashion, let me proceed to the nonsensical part of this blog post. Goodbye.

ANSDHYGUEHJIRUWERRIKOQKSMKAMZASXAUSBXDFN CBYXHAUJOSSSTONEIRHUAHEIWJEOMDAFUHFUFCKD CMDKFEWRHAKMDW,XZMjugywstwysianxjewudbamoOIRHQW GEYWGDJNMVIEHQQLALODIXMZZGI ODOIOOOIAIUZIANHAHAHHAHAIXIJEMOIHUGGF GFHARGHHHGAROOFIUCKAIJDMALZZXKZS!

Harry Potter

2011-07-10T01:35:00.000+08:00

I am so stoked for Harry Potter dammit. But a lot of problems are popping up. Eg. someone can't make it for this showing, another can't make it for that showing, so...

I'll just deal with it tomorrow when I'm not this stoned with ice cream in my belly.

Yes, I consumed ice cream at this late hour. So sue me.

As you can probably tell by now, I'm not really in the mood for long sentences so...

...just bear with me as you read my thoughts in broken sentence structures.

I've been listening to songs about crushes and they're making me feel all tingly inside!
They make me feel like wearing a yellow sundress and frolicking in the meadow.

But first I'd have to find a yellow sundress that's not expensive, and also, a meadow.

Except my hair isn't that long, and that girl is obviously not Asian.
Plus I'll probably get bored after ten minutes and start karaoke-ing to the songs playing in my head.

Looking at the settings, it'll probably be The Sound Of Music.

Voiceless

2011-07-08T19:57:00.000+08:00

I always forget to fully appreciate the use of my voice until it's gone. Ugh. Mayday Parade has done it to me this time. Last time it was Paramore. Before that it was Muse. Before that it was my beloved Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. Who'll it be next time?

Now I can only lip-sync and not sing off-key like I always do. This sucks.

And the worst part is I've exhausted the appropriate usage of Twitter and Facebook that I'm turning to my dying blog here. You know its life is being slowly sucked out when all the people on your tagboard are strangers trying to get you to purchase holiday packages to Pulau Ubin.

How I wish someone would come in here and serenade me because I can't serenade myself right now.

Finishing Harry Potter

2011-06-21T12:38:00.000+08:00

After a year of procrastination, I have finally finished the last Harry Potter book. Major feat, considering how many more books I have left unread, lying around at home.

Right now I am tempted once again to buy the whole set of the series. It costs $144!

I am totally craving these now! Imagine, I could pick out one and just start reading from the middle. Such indulgence.

Concerts

2011-06-16T18:07:00.002+08:00

Why is Paramore coming to Singapore again?? They only have a new song on the Transformers soundtrack; plus Josh Farro left, so only Jeremy is left for me to ogle. And he's always in the shadows so what's there to look at?

Fine, there's still the music, but I've already been to their concert the last time they were here, so it's just gonna be the same songs. I doubt they'd perform more songs off their first album, which is why I went the first time, and got disappointed.

Anyway, the only concerts I'd pay good money for this year would only be [not in any particular order]:

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Taking Back Sunday
The Used
Saosin
Muse (Yes, they'd been here tons of times but I've only been to them once, and I would maybe buffet* someone unconscious (instead of kill, y'know?) to go again)
Across Five Aprils (Ha. That would never happen in at least ten more Aprils)
The Killers
Arctic Monkeys (Will also never happen)
Florence + The Machine
5566 (Heh. It's a funny name to put on this list. But in all honesty, I really would go to their concert this time!)
Foo Fighters (Am hyperventilating just thinking of the minuscule possibility)
Ellie Goulding
Jamie Scott And The Town
Joss Stone (Oh, how I wish)
Kasabian
The Kooks
Relient K
Scary Kids Scaring Kids (probably just the supporting act, though. I doubt anyone here's heard of them)
Farewell (ditto)
Shinedown
Seether

This is officially my wish list of bands/artists to grace the likes of Singapore.
I'm wistfully staring at the names now. Great.

P.S. Taking Back Sunday's new album is coming! Are you excited or what!?

P.P.S. *Buffet is a word I've learned recently, so I'm trying to practice. It means to strike, beat repeatedly.

Disheartened

2011-06-13T20:54:00.001+08:00

Sometimes it just seems like you're determined to hate me. You make me feel like going back into my mom's womb.

Chilli Of The Month

2011-02-02T22:19:00.004+08:00

The other day, I met my soul mate.

Well, among my other soul mates, he was the most recent and freshest in my memory, okay? So stop your snickering.

I was chatting and laughing with my colleague Serene and my ex-colleague Xiang Ning (she'd quit for school) at work, when the abovementioned soul mate strolled into the store. He had short blond hair, wore dark blue jeans that hung on his frame perfectly, and was wearing a white graphic T-shirt.

FYI, I have this thing for white T-shirts. Especially if they are on chillies' bodies.
Or rather, I have this thing for chillies, especially if they are in white T-shirts.

Anyway, the bestest part of him (I know, right? There's better?!):

He had tattoos on the backs of his forearms, both identical. They looked like the Deathly Hallows symbol in Harry Potter!

I know, so hot, right?

There was a point where he was looking at a shelf of CDs, back facing us, and he bent a little to scratch the back of his left knee. Serene nudged me and said, "Cheryl, go help him scratch!"

Cue maniacal laughter.

He then proceeded to the counter to have us search the database for a title: Spill Canvas.
My head went BOOM!
I'd heard of that band before; I had one song in my iTunes!

But at that moment, my brain ceased to function. My mouth formed the words, "Sorry, we don't carry that band," to which he replied, in an awesomely sarcastic way, "Oh man! Great, that's awesome."

See?? SOUL MATE MATERIAL.

Usually I'd ask the customer if they'd like us to special-order the CD from the US, then get their name and number if they did. But it was as if my mind stopped turning its wheels. Mourned silence ensued (you know, 'cause he couldn't get that CD), then he said, "Thanks," and left my life forever.

Oh well. It was good while it lasted.
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You guys know how I always say Twitter sucks? Well, I still believe that, but lately I've gotten slightly less prejudiced against it. I GOT REALLY BORED. So after the usual Facebook stuff, I opened a new tab and surreptitiously typed the words, "twitter.com," as if my macbook would judge me.

Then I signed in, and replied to the few tweets mentioning me. Two.

Then I tweeted. Of what, I don't remember, and don't want to remember. Twitter is not exactly my guilty pleasure -- that's Cupcake Corner and It Girl on Facebook -- since it doesn't really pleasure me much. I guess it entertains me for a few minutes, so I'd call it my guilty entertainment.

I didn't use to tweet at all, because I had my own version of Twitter: Sophia, Angelina, and Chand (and sometimes Rachel).

Anything happened that I wanted to share, these three (or four) people were usually the ones whom I'd want to tell it to. Maybe something mundane like, "My mom made me eat a firecracker!" or huge news such as, "Today I met another soul mate! He's hot," I just texted them and immediately felt, I'm not sure, gratified? Or relieved? Whatever it is that you feel after you tweet something.

After a few months of exceeded free SMS limits though, I stopped, hence beginning my Twitter era. Sometimes I just refuse to accept change. Except the ones we can spend/save, like those cute little 5 cents that some of my friends always refuse to keep.

Toilet Seat Contaminators

2011-01-31T00:15:00.001+08:00

Argh, I abhor those inconsiderate cows

who stand on toilet seats. Not just that, they don't even bother to wipe off the evidence! You need to possess a zero degree of shame to be able to walk away like that.

It's because of people like you that you even need to squat on the seats! I bet you don't wash your hands, too.

I curse you, toilet seat-contaminators, that you plunge your foot into the bowl and get stuck for a considerably long time, getting free only when the janitors start their shift, while everyone in line stares at you with deep and deserved contempt.
__________________________________________________________________________________

That was my elaborate and superfluous way of saying, "F you, you assholes."

I am currently so hungry that I can't think of anything else to blog about. Perhaps I'll just ramble on about the mundane things that I do in my life, such as waking up on my off day to wonderful weather -- full-on rain in the middle of the afternoon, that rendered my whole house a dark and frosty atmosphere.

Speaking of dark and frosty, I think I shall abandon my fruitless attempt at a blog and gorge on Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Macadamia. It = minutes of bountiful bliss.

Sin Yee's blog post about Aussie lecturer

2010-11-29T01:01:00.000+08:00

I just read Sin Yee's latest blog post, and I have to say, I empathize. Freddy Rodriguez is 35, after all, and most of you guys know that I have this thing for older guys.

Not that there were any experiences for me go on about this like I know what I'm talking about [insert sad face here].

Battery's running low on my macbook, 5%! Ciao ciao till next time, my amigos.

Apology to Sophia about RED/Joss Stone LP/Bridget Jones's Diary

2010-11-23T22:16:00.000+08:00

Phia and Anzhu, if you're reading this, I'm sorry about watching RED first without you guys! 'Cause we never actually said anything about watching it.

And here's a continued list of the items I bought during Capitol's moving-out sale! Without pictures, though, because it's just too much trouble.

1. Me, Myself & Irene
2. Donnie Darko
3. The Automatic - Not Accepted Anywhere
4. Taking Back Sunday - Louder Now Part Two
5. The Used - Berth
6. Saosin - Come Close
7. The Dandy Warhols - ...The Dandy Warhols Come Down
8. The Dandy Warhols - Odditorium
9. The Dandy Warhols - Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia
(The three Dandy Warhols albums cost only $2 each!)
10. American Blues from the Putumayo series
11. Joss Stone - The Soul Sessions
12. The Datsuns - Headstunts
13. The Used - The Used vinyl

And last but absolutely not least - Joss Stone's best album, Mind, Body & Soul on vinyl! It's my early Christmas present from Sophia, too! She's awesome.

(I meant both Joss Stone and Sophia.)

I'm re-watching Bridget Jones's Diary while trying to finish up this blog post, but it's proving extremely difficult. Renée Zellweger is awesome. And all the British accents are making it hard for me to concentrate on this blog post.

Colin Firth is so friggin' charming as Mark Darcy that I can't help but swoon. And Renée is just so good at being Bridget Jones.

Gosh this movie is so funny; I love it.

Copying Sophia/Capitol's Packing Day/Good News/Movie With Heidi/Mom's Hospitalization

2010-11-23T00:56:00.003+08:00

Because Sophia shared with us her wallpaper, I shall share mine with everyone, too. Ron mustn't lose to Jake Gyllenhaal.

Today was Capitol's final day. Well, technically yesterday was, but today we had to pack up all the remaining sale stocks, computers, documents, shelves and stuff. It was a bit melancholy at first, but then everyone was in such a great mood (since we didn't have to deal with the routine things like opening the store at 11am and dealing with customers), so we started having fun.

At first my colleague Gar Meng (whom I call Jiaming because he hates his Chinese name) kept singing Justin Bieber's Baby, because somehow Mark brought it up that he would never buy his albums for his sons.

So all the while everybody was exchanging banter and mocking each other and randomly bursting into random songs. Which was awesome.

Then Bob went to Cathay with the mover guys; they didn't know how to go. So that left Mark, me, Heidi and Gar Meng. After about an hour or two of packing up everything, Mark decided that we should all head to Funan for an impromptu field trip, and also to help look for a birthday cake for his son.

Right when we reached Funan, Chris called to say that he would be arriving in two minutes in the moving van, which resulted in absolute brouhaha. As in, chaotic haha's.

Bernard arrived to help out, but seeing as we've already done everything, he basically just came by to kick around Bob's deflated soccer ball and trash the place with us. We totally trashed it like rock stars.

After officially locking up the place for good (and writing "CLOSED FOREVER" in different languages on the glass door), we went to Ya Kun Kaya Toast [in that Xchange place, whassitcalled?] and hung out for a while.

Then Mark, Bob and Bernard went to smoke outside Raffles City while Heidi and I headed for the Cathay to see if there was any good movie to kill time with.

OH WAIT! Before all this, I have some good news to share with my fellow ~~minions~~ friends.

Those of you whom I've told that I'm going to be stationed at OUB Centre in Raffles Place, despair no more - I've just got the news that I'm instead going to Bugis!

It's no Taka, but still better than OUB. I have nothing against that place, just that it's full of office-y people that, honestly, quite bore me. I can handle cheena questions, rather than professional-talking professionals.

Going back to the topic at hand, Heidi and I went to watch the movie RED, which stands for Retired, Extremely Dangerous. It was good! I love Bruce Willis. And Helen Mirren. And Morgan Freeman. And that other guy.

Some of the jokes were slightly lame, but still tolerable, and the subtle ones are really funny. There was this scene where Mary-Louise Parker makes a jibe about Bruce Willis' lack of hair, and I couldn't stop giggling at that one, long after everyone has stopped laughing.
Sometimes I do that - continue laughing about one particular joke even when everybody else has moved on, so my friends tend to hit me in the arm and shush me during a movie.

Anyway, on a graver note, my mom went to the hospital today because of a hemorrhoid she got a week ago. She just couldn't take the pain any longer and finally went for treatment, and it turned out that it wasn't a hemorrhoid! It was a bacterial infection.

My poor mom.

She is currently undergoing surgery right now, probably. Luckily, I'm off tomorrow, so I'll be able to visit her in the evening with my dad after he gets off work.
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I'm watching a rerun of that show, Million Singer (title goes to show how bad the Taiwanese are at English), and I absolutely abhor Yao Yao. She acts cute, and to top it all off, she can't sing. At least if she could carry a tune, I wouldn't mind so much; I just want to get the show moving on so I can listen to Hebe. But Yao Yao is making my ears cry for earmuffs! Tsk.

Somebody remove her larynx.

Chilli Crossing Road

2010-11-21T01:56:00.001+08:00

Indirectly, it was the chilli's fault that I almost got killed on Friday.

I was crossing the road from City Hall MRT station to Capitol Centre, when I saw this chilli crossing the same road as I was, but opposite my direction. So as I was staring at him, he suddenly started jogging across.

I remember thinking, "Hmm. There're no cars...why's he running?" Continued staring.

Then common sense set in and I realized I needed to look right for oncoming cars, and sure enough, there was one headed my way. That's why the chilli was running. I followed suit and got to my destination safely, but just barely. I'm sorry, Mom, for being careless with my life because of ogling. It's a stupid reason to die.

Guess what? Capitol Gramophone has been having a sale since the 10th of this month, so I've been keeping things away for myself, and today I bought a few more items. Here's a list of all that I've bought during the sale (just because I don't really have the inspiration to blog about important stuff + the fact that lists are one of my favorite pastimes):

Rhythm & Blues from the Putumayo series

The Soul Sessions by Joss Stone

Come Close CD/DVD by Saosin

Bridget Jones's Diary Soundtrack

Berth CD/DVD by The Used

Xmas List

2010-11-19T01:16:00.000+08:00

I'm not Christian, so technically I shouldn't celebrate Christmas. But I shall celebrate the commerical Christmas, which basically carries no meaning, sadly. Just another occasion for people to pig out and spend like mad without feeling too guilty. Which sounds perfect to me, so...here's a list!

Inception: The Shooting Script by Christopher Nolan

It has all the behind-the-scenes stuff, plus it goes in-depth with the plot and ideas behind the story, which intrigues me so much. I need the book to fully understand and appreciate the movie even more!

The Extraordinary Secrets Of April, May & June by Robin Benway

She's the author of Audrey, Wait! 'Nuff said.

Thing from Robinsons at Centrepoint

I can't exactly state what it is, because we're getting it for Sophia, too. Phia, don't go a-lookin', please.

A Confederacy Of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole

It's a hilarious book. I can do without it, but it's going on the list because it [the list, I mean] seems too bare.

That's about it for now. I'll definitely update with more, seeing as how I can't seem to resist temptation.

Been Away

2010-11-17T02:51:00.000+08:00

I haven't laid a finger on my darling macbook for the past three or four days, and it seems like Cupcake Corner has moved on without me.

I had about twenty gifts awaiting my acceptance (which felt awesome - woohoo!), then I got a pleasant surprise - my cupcakes were still unspoiled!

But my point is, as I went round to my neighbors' stores, I saw tons of new decor and layouts, which made me feel like I've neglected my beloved Brouhaha (that's the name of my Cupcake Corner) for a day too many.

I'm sorry, Brouhaha. I'm back now.

I have so many things to blog about! They're mainly about Capitol's moving-out sale, which started on the 10th of this month. Chris, our operations manager, told me I could be the Champion Cashier after this sale; my fingers were practically flying off the keyboard for typing the numbers so fast. Today I almost charged a customer, on his credit card, $922.00 instead of $92.00. Oops. Hehehe.

Last week, someone put on this pop compilation that consisted of Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, etc.

Justin Bieber's song, Eenie Meenie came on, and I was eating my lunch in the pantry. Almost choked. Anyway, I endured my way through the song, and the next song came on. Miley Cyrus' Can't Be Tamed.

Now, if you've heard that song before, you would know that it mainly consists of her screeching, "Can't be TAMED, can't be TAMED," in a highly annoying, nasal voice. So before I could subject my poor ears to that kind of maniacal screeching, I put down my chopsticks, walked out of the pantry to the CD player, and pressed Next.

Baby came on. Seemed like I was destined to be stuck with Mr. Bieber. Oh well.

Scary weird friend dying dream/Beauty pageant dream

2010-11-05T12:34:00.000+08:00

I just had one of my weirdest dreams ever a few minutes ago, and I just had to blog about it immediately. I haven't even brushed my teeth yet.

I don't know how it started out, but I was friends with Neville Longbottom (of Harry Potter) in my dream, except his name was Neil. We were in a science lab together with other people, busy working on class assignments.

Then somehow afterwards, he approached me while I was leaving the school and asked to join me in whatever I was about to do, like he actually knew where I was going. So I let him follow me outside, which was this dark purple world. The whole sky was deep purple and there were high-tech monorail tracks everywhere, with flying vehicles.

I led him to the roof of this random tall building, and asked him, "Do you believe you can fly?" And he nodded.

In this dream, I had discovered a secret. If you possessed this common household item (I seriously cannot remember what it was!), you could fly. So naturally I had extras in my bag and I handed one to Neil/Neville. He was so scared about it, but he really wanted to try it. He had complete faith in what I said. So did I.

I'd done it a lot before in my dream, apparently, so I told him that, and that there was nothing to worry about. Just keep the thing in your pocket, and he'd fly.

Then I jumped. But funnily, there wasn't that feeling of freefall you'd get that wakes you up in the middle of the dream. Then the focus shifted to Neil. He followed suit, but instead of slowing down and flying, he just continued to fall rapidly towards the ground.

Then he hit it, and died.

When he hit the ground, my whole dream changed to this cartoon picture of the Earth, with Neil pasted on top of it in an astronaut suit. I say pasted exactly how I mean it. Flat on his back, pasted.

Then suddenly I was in the school hall, where there was an ongoing play. I was unconscious, floating above the stage characters in an astronaut suit. The students backstage pulled me to the ground - I don't know how - and I woke up (in the dream), blabbering and sobbing about Neil.

NO ONE believed me.

Then I caught sight of our discipline master, who for some twisted reason was the operations manager of Gramophone, Chris! I knew he'd believe me, so I ran to him and told him everything.

Suddenly the scene changed to a school hallway, with mud green walls. Students were walking in and out of the classrooms freely, every few minutes.

I was sitting in the doorway of a classroom with my friend Ruby. But in the dream, she wasn't my friend; she wanted to get me to admit to the murder of Neil.

She started questioning me about that night, even to the point of wanting to know what I was wearing, and why I had an extra pair of jeans in my bag. [The pair of extra jeans came from my friend Shuyi, who bought jeans for me and gave them to me on the day Neil died.]

Ruby even brought me to the school's administration office and made the teachers inquisition me there. By then I was so distraught over Neil's death that I'd started sobbing every time I tried to speak. The teachers eventually believed me.

Then I woke up, for real.
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Yesterday, I was late for work because of another dream that woke me up only at 10:22AM.

I was in a beauty pageant held annually between schools.

Ha, got your attention!

But it's true. At least, in my dream.

Miss Chia was the teacher in charge of the pageant contestants. At first I was just chilling with my friends in the canteen when some girl approached me and told me I'd been selected for the pageant.

My friends were all, "Go for it, Cheryl!"
So I said yes.

As I was on the excursion bus to the venue where they held the preliminary round, I suddenly remembered, "Oh shit, I have to catwalk."

The bus was filled with other contestants from other schools, so I knew none of them. They were giving me weird looks though, like, "Is this girl really a contestant? That's so wrong."

So when the bus let us out at a pit stop to freshen up before hitting the road again, I bailed.

I called Sophia on my cell phone and told her what I'd realized. Uh-uh, no catwalking for moi.

She told me that Miss Chia was gonna be majorly pissed off, which swayed me for a moment. Her wrath is scary. But the idea of catwalking made me shudder more, so I decided to escape that day for a while and meet up with Sophia, Anzhu and Rachel. Apparently we were supposed to be hanging out that day before I got approached for the pageant.

Sophia got a little annoyed on the phone because I was hysterically listing out the pros and cons of staying for the pageant, and she was playing Pokemon on her Nintendo DS. So I got annoyed, and hung up.

Then I woke up.
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Hardcore, huh? Two crazy dreams in two consecutive days. I should have gotten ready now to leave my house, but instead I had this insane urge to write down everything about my dreams before I forget any details. So now I'm late. But luckily, not for work. Just another ordinary off day today.

Which means I'm meeting Sophia and Anzhu, just to hang out. But we're going jogging later.

Yes, I am. Stop doubting me! Even though I can only run two rounds, it's still a start!

Till tonight, when I'll regal you with fantastic stories about how I flew ten thousand laps.

Running with chillies/facial stuff/bimbo aunties

2010-11-04T01:00:00.000+08:00

I'm telling you guys, if there's one thing I hate more than bimbos, it's auntie bimbos.

I didn't know I had this aversion to them until I met one. Today.

(Well technically yesterday, since it's already 12:51AM Thursday now.)

She was wearing this super short dress which, frankly, looked like an apron.
One of the straps was falling off her shoulder. Clearly, aunties can dress like sluts, too.
The way she spoke, oh my god - bimbos' voices are already hard to tolerate; auntie bimbos are worse. It's like, how old are you now, auntie? You still want to act cute and dumb?

When she finally left after an excruciating half hour, during which she kept bugging me with questions that I already answered, I felt dumber, like my IQ dropped a few points. My poor brain cells. I'm into the negative numbers now.

So people, a word of warning:

Beware the auntie bimbos.

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I went jogging again on Tuesday, with Anzhu and Soph. It was GLORIOUS.

When we went in the stadium, first thing I noticed was the sheer amount of people compared to the few stragglers last time (since we went at closing time).

The field in the middle of the stadium had two teams playing against each other in soccer, and what made the whole experience awesome is that one of the teams were tomatoes. Some of them were chillies, in fact.

Anyway, I ran two rounds, walked two total. Not a bad start for moi. After jogging, as Soph and I sat on the bleachers waiting for Anzhu to finish her round (she's crazy; six rounds jogging, one round walking!), I tried to decide on the chilli I wanted to smile at, but I just couldn't pick one!
They were sitting on the bleachers beside ours, divided by a walkway. Before I could make some eye contact, they all went back to the field for another game. Argh.

I plan to get more Tuesdays off next roster.
_________________________________________________________________________________

Afterwards we went to Hougang Mall, and Sasa was having a sale at the atrium! This is the first year that I've started paying attention to beauty products. Hasn't helped much, but it's a start, at least. Many changes this year!

We were already walking towards the exit (or entrance) of the mall when I caught sight of the sale and voluntarily strolled back to the atrium. Sophia told me later that she was actually shocked.

I like Ginvera products. Even their shower foam. I like the little flecks of herbs (or whatever they are) in the shower gel! Looks so yummy [for my skin].

Sophia said we are all getting girlier in our own ways. I began paying attention to my face (e.g. buying masks, cleanser, blackhead removers, etc.); Sophia started buying dresses; Anzhu just...looks girlier in general. Maybe it's her hair.

Is it a good thing? Or am I just succumbing to the superficial expectations of our society?

Whatever.

FATT/Bank Chilli Opportunites/...

2010-11-02T01:48:00.000+08:00

Recently I started playing Nightclub City on Facebook, simply because Chand told me about her nightclub, which she'd described as a "geisha disco ball". That sounded extremely hilarious to me, so I decided to check it out.

The colors are way too bright and the graphics too in-my-face for me to get hooked on the game, but I did get some good stuff out of it.

For example, you could pick a genre of music to play in your club for your sets, so I clicked on Rock, and at the left bottom of the screen you could see the artist and title of the song your club was currently playing.

I fell in love with this band called Fitz And The Tantrums. They're really cool. Soul, indie and pop mixed together. You can have a listen at their official store.

I can't seem to download them online; no one's uploaded the album at all. All I can find are individual songs, and I have a habit of downloading whole albums. But, luckily, their shipping and handling costs are only US$3.15, so I figure I'll order it at the end of the month if I still have some money to spare. If anyone wants one, tell me before then.
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Lately I've been going to the bank a lot. Every day (except Sunday), we have to deposit the previous night's cash intake at OCBC Bank at Citylink Mall. I have to walk past the newly opened Hershey's every time, which makes it difficult for me to resist temptation.

But my main point: the popcorn shop next to Hershey's.

Before the stores were done renovating and setting up, I was walking past them to the bank when I saw this total chili talking with this lady outside the popcorn store. I heard his voice. His accent was amazingly cute! But that was the last time I ever saw him. The next few times I went to the bank, he wasn't there anymore.

BUT!
A new store opened recently, two stores before the bank. It's called Jericho - Dead Sea Cosmetics.
Now, we all know of those push-cart stalls that those hot foreigners tend? Yeah, now there's a whole store with those chillies. Both female and male, but I don't care about the former.

Today I went to the bank again, and while I was still mourning over the absence of Popcorn Guy, I noticed this total chilli chatting up a customer at Jericho. His accent was so hot.

I have since resolved to be the one going to the bank every time. I could use a respite from all those idiotic customers who can't seem to read.

We have this gigantic sign pasted onto the glass front of our store, indicating our moving-out sale starts on the 10th of November.

Apparently people can't read past MOVING-OUT SALE, or they are dumb. Ever since we put up the sign, I've been getting this:

"Is this discounted?"
"Is this the final price after the discount?"
"Where're your $15 blu-rays?"
"Can I get this at 70% off?"
"Is this on sale?"

As for the last question, sometimes they are so stupid at phrasing their questions that they ask, "Is this for sale?"
And I'd be all, "Yes, it's for sale."
Then they'd go, "But it's so expensive! How much would it be after the discount?"
And I'd answer, "Oh, you mean the moving-out sale? It starts on the 10th."
Them: "Oh! Not now? So I guess I should come back on the 10th."

After which I'd have to go into a long explanation about how the sale stocks would be different from the current stocks. Hellooo, which company in its right mind would discount the new Katy Perry/Maroon 5/Glee/Justin Bieber/Metallica/Toy Story 3, etc. stuff?

Thus, every day at work we have to waste bucketloads of saliva just to explain that No, we are not freaking having the sale right now. Get the heck out of my face and stop asking for discounts, you cheap asshole.

Phew. I feel better now.

44-minute post

2010-11-01T00:45:00.001+08:00

I just looked at the time and realized: it took me forty-four minutes total to write my previous blog post.

Awesome.

Exercise/The Social Network

2010-11-01T00:43:00.000+08:00

I have to say, exercise has never been my thing, and still isn't.

But I'm trying to do it. So shut your pieholes that are filled with, "Har har, Cheryl, you - running?!"

So yesterday (it's 11:59PM now as I'm writing this, so technically it is still yesterday) I went jogging with my two beloved ~~minions~~ friends, Anzhu and Sophia, and it was so stupid. We dawdled for a long while and only arrived at Serangoon Stadium at 8:23PM.

The guy there kind of chased after us and said, "We close at 8:30."

Thank you, mothertooter.*

So the three of us looked at each other and decided, heck, since we were already there (and after about twenty minutes' worth of walking from Anzhu's house, too), we might as well use up whatever time we had left. But that meant someone had to look after our things and naturally - being the awesome, pentastic** person that I am - I offered to do it.

The two of them ran one lap, then came back to me, ignoring my attempts to convey that there was still about five minutes left of exercise for them. Clearly, they weren't fluent in arm + facial expression language.

As it turned out, Sophia switched places with me and looked after our stuff while Anzhu continued with a second run, I with my first one.

What can I say about it? It was...dramatic. At least, in my head.

I was fine in the first half of the lap, breathing like how our Phys Ed teacher taught us way back in secondary school. So there I was, jogging like a seasoned pro, thinking, "Wow, this isn't bad! I'm doing so good! I feel like I just became healthy!" Then I caught up with Anzhu, and the pain began.

First I couldn't breathe properly. I was positively wheezing, in a totally non-positive*** way.

"Oh shit, breathe! What happened to in, in, out, out, out, in??"
"Crap, I feel like my legs are gonna give way soon!"
"Anzhu, I can't breathe!"
"Die, I can't feel my legs!"
"Should I stop?"

These were the various questions I pelted at Anzhu as I ran alongside her for the second half of the track.

In the end, I made it through the whole lap, and almost collapsed at Sophia's feet, if not for the recollection of the words, "You might die if you stop immediately after a vigorous exercise. It's better to cool down first with a slow jog or gentle exercise."
I'm not sure where I heard it - probably every single person I've met who possesses common sense.

So of course I continued jogging (although my feet never left even two inches off of the ground) on the spot. Then as we were chatting about the runs, I forgot about cooling down and plopped down beside Sophia, taking a sip from my 100Plus.

Yup, she did gasp at me about forgetting to cool down thoroughly.

All in all, although it wasn't a complete workout, I still think it was a good start, at least. Me, exercising!

We're doing it again on Friday, I think. Anyone care to join us?

*I didn't mean it; it was just for dramatic/comic effect.

**Pentastic means fantastic, but in Pen fashion. As for those of you who are going, "What's Pen??", that's another blog post altogether. It will be revealed soon enough. Just...remind me to blog about it.

***I know I could've used the word negative, but bear with it; it's for literary effect.

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This is basically another post. Because it's a completely different topic.

It's about the movie, The Social Network!

I like it.

It's kind of a biography, about the founder of Facebook (Mark Zuckerberg) and all the obstacles along the way. The jokes were subtle, the casting was good, and the dialogue was awesomely clever.

My only regret is that there weren't any hot guys for me to ogle. Sure, the lead guy was cute, but his character was too much of a clueless jerk to be appealing (to me). And the other guys - gay. I'm not sure if it was made to be that way, but they actually seemed greasy to me. I don't mean that in the oily way.

Go watch it.

RIP Fat Computer

2010-10-30T13:25:00.000+08:00

Okay, here is the long-awaited obituary of my beloved fat PC, aptly named Fat Computer. It died a slow and pixelated death, I'm sad to say.

It lived a glorious three years (maybe four - I'm not too sure), half of which was spent pissing me off. Even though our relationship wasn't as good as it could've been in the end, I still appreciate the total indifference with which it took my endless insults. It was almost like it couldn't hear me.

So apparently in addition being fat, it was deaf, too. Immune to stimuli, e.g. pokes, slams, random combination of key-holding. Ctrl+Alt+Del never worked in the latter half of its life.

I admit, silent courage had coursed through your motherboard, but gosh, couldn't you just work properly so I could stop abusing you? On second thought, I take back the salute I was gonna compliment you with.

Your retaliations were, at best, immature and amateur. Sure, you pissed me off entirely just fine, but was that the best you could do? Huh? You should've at least threw up some sparks or fireworks so that I would be impressed and leave you alone. Instead, you just crashed and crashed without warning. Self-destruction just to get back at me? You lousy piece of plastic and metal chips.

I had no choice but to resort to verbal put-downs. You pushed me to it. Can't blame me if your cheap plastic covering wasn't thick enough to repel my justified insults. I'm sorry I stooped to your level, but you started it.

Okay, I gotta chill. You're dead already. Goodbye, Fatty, and normally I wouldn't say this because beauty isn't skin-deep (but in terms of technology, it totally is) - I hope you're skinny in your next life.
Rest in junkyard (garang guni) peace.

The end.

Wank Around The Globe!

2010-10-29T02:11:00.000+08:00

Today a customer asked the funniest question, and she didn't even mean it.

I was at the counter with my colleague Gar Meng, and she came up to me, holding a piece of paper.
She showed it to me, and in Mandarin, asked me if we had this DVD for kids.

The paper said two things [in messy handwriting, but the spelling was perfectly clear]:

_________________________

Barape [something something]

Wank around the globe

_________________________

At first I didn't realize anything weird, except when I typed in "barape" I wanted to laugh, 'cause the word "rape" put together with "kids' DVD" cracked me up. But I figured maybe it was another language; who was I to judge? So I stifled my childish thoughts and told her we didn't have that show.

So she pointed to the bottom line and asked me to check for that.

"Wank around the globe"

At this point, Gar Meng and I were exchanging incredulous glances and busy trying not to laugh out loud. Was this woman for real?? Did she sincerely have no clue that she was looking for a kids' show named "WANK Around The Globe"??

I forced myself to type the words "wank arou" into the system; who knows? Maybe some freak really did produce that show. But of course not.

As the woman was walking away, I started laughing silently. "Can she, like, leave now so I can laugh openly?!?"

I'm sorry, I'm being extremely rude, but I can't help it. It's for kids?!?!

What has the world evolved to now?

Speaking of wanks (or wankers, in this case - one particular wanker), there's this customer, M, who bought a few US imported blu-ray discs a few weeks back after hour-long debates about whether they were indeed US imports or not.

HE IS A HUGE WANKER. AND I AM NOT COMPLIMENTING HIM IN ANY MEANING.

He called my store at 9:23PM today, and being the nice, fantastic, wonderful person that I am, I answered the phone since it wasn't 9:30PM yet (that's when we close for the night).

I fully regret that now.

He kept me on the phone for a good ten minutes, all of which I could only make out that he was dissatisfied. Apparently one of the discs wasn't imported from the States, so he couldn't sleep well at night until he makes sure all of us know he didn't get the US import, give him the correct one, and spend the rest of our lives repenting our mistake.

Freaking weirdo. He's seriously wack in the head, I tell ya. Towards the end of the phone call, he blurted that he was about five minutes away from my store and tells me to wait for him. So, being the fantastically patient person that I am, I said, "Sure. See you," and hung up.

During that five minutes (which turned out to be fifteen, thankyouverymuch, M), I called my other branch that most possibly had the US import, and after checking that it was definitely from the States, told them to put it aside for M.

When he finally arrived at my store, Gar Meng was all ready to fake-smile him to death.
After a ton of explanation, he comprehended what I said and left for the other branch. I had to pick up all my dropped brain cells after that. Ugh. I feel dumber now.

Just bear with me for a few more paragraphs. It's not finished. M's not finished, the darned cow.

Around 11:30PM I got a call from my manager who was at the other branch. M made them all stay half an hour later after closing time. He is just that awesome.

I'd made a vow not to swear any more, and that if I did, I'd put $1 into my piggy bank. I'm now $5 poorer. (But hooray, I saved $5!)

I bet M worked on "Wank Around The Globe".

Chick Flick - You Again

2010-10-28T00:03:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since I've watched a chick flick, so You Again was a refreshing change from The Men Who Stare At Goats, Inception, Buried, etc.

Jamie Lee Curtis was, as always, awesomely perfect. And though I have a sort of disdain for Kristen Bell, she wasn't too bad in this movie. I think my main problem with her is that she acts way too delicately for comedies. Unlike Renee Zellweger, Kristen Bell's stunts are too prettified. Renee's great.

Sometimes I just wish Mean Girls would have a sequel.

Cupcake Corner

2010-10-26T13:55:00.000+08:00

Since this is my first blog post in ages, I figured we should commemorate this occasion with something that I'm currently obsessed with - Cupcake Corner!

Okay, that's all I have to say about it. Frankly, it's boring. But I still am addicted to it.

Nothing's changed much since the last time I've blogged. No life-changing decisions, miracles; heck, I didn't even find any money on the ground.

And now I shall cut this post short to defecate. Excuse me.