Amazeballs

Do you ever get that feeling like, "OMG he likes [insert forgotten old movie/weird food flavor/obscure band] too? We're perfect for each other!!"

I get that every once in a while because a) I am easily excitable; b) I like a lot of things in general.

Sometimes I feel pangs of wistfulness as I scroll through news feeds on social media platforms, and realize that I share certain shockingly specific interests with some people. The wistful part is that we aren't closer friends but just casual acquaintances. We could be so much more!!!!

The similarities are so mind-blowingly coincidental that I can't help but proclaim us soulmates/BFFs in my head. But of course, life doesn't really work that way even though I try really hard to make it so.

I guess it goes to show how mysteriously God works. Because why Lord, why?

It's not to contradict my previous post about being content with where I am and not being in a relationship - I'm serious about that for sure. But I just can't resist wondering why these people aren't the one I'm waiting for.

Perhaps it's all about timing, perhaps it just isn't. Whatever it is, I've put my faith in Him and am learning not to worry. It's just jarring to know that we are still nothing more than casual hi-bye friends despite these coincidences. Amazing, maybe.

Life is just full of surprises. (God, too.)

Thankful

It's hilarious sometimes when I read through my older posts and realize the massive change of content. Just a few months back I'd been fawning over some guy; a few weeks before that I'd been infatuated with another one; for the past few years there's always been some guy or other.

But after finding God, there's been no rush. No more desperately hoping for some guy to sweep me off my feet.

The contrast of my mindsets then and now is pretty jarring. I mean, I still want someone to love and to hold till death do us part, but I don't need it right now. Right now I get to experience my walk with my Father on my own, and to improve myself as a person before I commit myself to a relationship. I have faith that there's someone planned for me, and that I will meet him when the time is right. Or maybe I've already met him. We'll never know till we know.

Meanwhile I'm just trying to figure out my place in this vast world just like everybody else. Career paths to embark on, friendships to forge, family members to love, music to discover, concerts to attend, books to read, films and shows to digest, cafes to hop; the list is endless. What's a girl to do except to do it all and enjoy the ride?

Now I'm just grateful for all the friends and family that add color to my everyday life.

Just as I'm ending this post at 6am on the first day of 2015, I hear my dad closing the noisy gate of our house. I throw my phone on the bed, rush out of my room and fling open the wooden door to see my dad.

He gets a shock at my sudden appearance in the wee hours of the morning, but as I say, "Happy new year, Pa," you can see a hint of a smile on his weary face.

Greeting my dad at the door as he leaves for another day at work, then going back to my room to finish up a blog post and submitting myself to a good morning's sleep (and probably afternoon). What is this, if not the best way to end a countdown to a new year?

Goodnight, good morning, and happy new year.