I realized quite a while ago that I am selective about secondhand cigarette smoke. If the person is a friend of mine, I'll be fine with any amount of smoke. But if it's a stranger or someone I detest, it feels as if I'm suffocating under the high risk of lung cancer.
So one should be assured of my affections when I mill around taking in one's secondhand smoke.
That is all.
It's not about looks. No matter how superficial a person is, it all boils down to character. So if you aren't confident with yourself and the way you look, do something about it. I don't mean just the physical aspects like going on a diet or exercising; I mean in terms of your self-perception. Don't put yourself down and then blame others for not picking you up.
If you don't think you're good enough, how the hell do you expect others to perceive you're good enough? It doesn't matter if we believe you are or not; if you don't believe it yourself, then what is the farking point? You're always gonna be thinking that you're inferior and feel insecure, then blame it on the other party when he/she doesn't make you feel better about yourself. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent, as Eleanor Roosevelt once said.
It's easy to head down a spiralling funk of low self-esteem and self-pity but trust me, all it does is make you feel useless and unappreciated. You owe it to yourself to be confident. Throw that self-doubt away because no one will ever put their hand in yours if you think it isn't fit to be held.
I cringe whenever I hear someone say, "Ugh she shouldn't wear that, look at her fats!" or something equally mean about a passer-by.
Perhaps as a joke in between close friends who know better and that it's only meant as a joke - that's absolutely fine.
But I have known some people in my life who sprinkle judgmental statements like that without thinking (or worse, what if they'd thought it through and decided to say it anyway?) and it always kills me a little inside.
It's bad enough that you're criticizing a stranger's appearance, but now you wanna put it out into the universe and see if I agree?
No way, José.
Beauty is subjective, just like art. Everyone has their own definition of it, so no matter what, you can't be perfect to everyone all at once. There is bound to be someone who thinks you look bad. It could be your own mother, too.
Therefore it doesn't make sense that we criticize others' appearances just because they don't fit into our perceived notion of beauty. How would you feel if you left the house feelin' fine and somebody commented that you didn't look as good as you thought you did?
So I say, if you think you look good, then you look good. It doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks (yes, not even your mother) because in the end, it's your opinion of yourself that truly matters. Sure, it's tough to be confident when someone just dumped a bucket of water over your head, but just remember what you loved about your outfit in the first place - those new earrings, that cool shirt, these fabulous pants - and just work it, gurl. (Or dude.)
Everything else is just noise.
